A New Week | Oct. 14th, 2024
Getting out of your own way, being seen, and succeeding more sustainably.
First, thank you so much for the incredibly positive response to my personal update last week. I had so many people reach out, friends congratulating me for my level of vulnerable courage and offering support. I said I would talk more about our plans, but I am taking the moment today to speak briefly about one plan in particular.
}I'm blown away by the response to my *very, very* simple recent LinkedIn post about our women's community. So many new women visited my profile. Many new followers. All female. 20+ subscriptions from women on my Substack. Three bookings. And we’re just getting started.
Why such a strong reaction? I think it's because too many of us incredible women—business owners, executives, educators, and mothers—don't take up the space we offer to everyone else.
It comes naturally to us to hold and offer space for those around us. It's part of many of our roles. But here's the thing: we never really learn how to replenish that space we give away. We don't know how to ask for it back or even realize that this is where loads of our energy is draining from.
I feel that deeply on a personal level, too.
This is why I built this group. Because I needed it as much as the women who asked me to run it. I'm glad I trusted them and myself, because what I found is transformative:
Being seen, feeling seen, and receiving the gift of practicing a new way of relating to yourself creates the sustainable (nervous system) capacity to do it for others.
Let that sink in for a moment.
We need spaces where we, as women, can connect deeply and be emotionally held. Spaces where we can refill our own cups after pouring so much out for others. It's not just nice to have—it's essential for our well-being and continued ability to support those around us.
"Holding space for women who hold space for many others" really should be one of our main slogans here.
One of the best ways of building businesses, for me, has always been to create what I would have needed in the past or lack substantially now. The authenticity, truth, and clarity that come with this approach trump any professional acumen, excellence, or brilliant use case.
So, if you checked out the site, read my previous post, or subscribed to my Substack: Reach out and let's chat.
I may not be exactly what you're looking for, but our conversation might open up ideas about what you truly need. And if this group ends up being what you're seeking, then I'm excited for you and me to build this community together.
Oh and if you are a man who finds himself in excellent company of incredible, caring, strong women, go check in on them and truly listen to what they need.
Much love,
Franzi
_____________________________________
Before I go:
Below is also the copy I wrote for the new site we built to learn more about what this group is all about. So, at your convenience you can read it here or on the actual page.
The Connection Among Women
If you've found your way here, you're likely a woman of deep commitment and ambition. As women, we have similar conditioning, life events, and desires. Although each of us is in a different chapter of our multifaceted continuum, we are all connected by our commitment, desires, everyday loves and duties, and frustrations.
The Power of Feminine Creative Energy
As women, we have a lot of maternal, creative energy for life and others. We do not just birth babies; we also carry the power of fertility in our center. We can move energy, create from zero, and find resilience from a place of active creating, not just output-ting. When we create from a place of joy, our nervous system is at ease - this may be writing, working, painting, mothering, gathering, building, or cooking using your creative essence. This is not a productive manner; it's expression and our creative essence at play.
Challenges Women Face in Modern Life
We tend to struggle with the demands of a rich and busy everyday life because we embody patterns from our lineage, patterns from social conditioning, patterns from what traditionally has been the definition of "femininity" in relation to power and leadership, and patterns from our own relationship to ourselves.
The Importance of Embracing Feminine Leadership
Until more of us can identify what holds us hostage in exploring our own feminine and embodied leadership, we will continue to live in the shadows of our lineage, shadows of others' expectations of us. We won't fuel the generational change we and our children need to consciously relate and be in a relationship with each other while honoring our truth, values, and convictions. On an even grander scale and specific to our time of political polarization and artificial intelligence taking over, the feminine reminds us of the softness needed to create environments of belonging, safety, and dignity. The feminine reminds us that we need real human touch to develop technology that serves humanity, not solutions that cost it.
For all of us to step into this level of faith and power with ourselves, we need to learn how to look back and understand what works for us, what moves us, and what energizes us daily. Instead, we were and are more commonly asked to look at all the things that are not enough, including ourselves.
Simplifying to Multiply: Focusing on Strengths
I say this all the time, and it's true: you have to simplify to multiply.
If you're putting the majority of your energy toward things you don't like and aren't good at, you'll never reach your full service to yourself and others, and the world.
Going Off the Beaten Path: Examples of Courageous Choices
And even if we finally feel called to move beyond ourselves and into a new level of truth with ourselves, our gut feeling is to isolate and perceive ourselves as unrelatable. It takes great courage to go off the beaten path. This path may look like:
starting to say what needs to be said within the corporate environment
quitting the job that has been holding you back from bringing your full innovative potential to your field or industry
deciding to retire from work for a few years because you have felt the need and desire to be home with your kids
leaving the "up and right"-trajectory and instead spending a few years standing still and going deep
The Purpose of the Women's Leadership Circle
We come together in the Women's Leadership Circle to support each other in our individually defined versions of going "off the beaten path." Doing this together strengthens our foundation of co-regulation, co-creation, and healing.
We are meant to remember each other's words and wisdom, when we face a similar situation like those we lean on. It gives us a sense of groundedness, faith and inspires us to keep going knowing others are cheering us on.
We are meant to be held when our ground feels unstable and turn fear into collective knowing.
We are meant to come together, even nurture small talk at times, as the bed of deeper trust potential.
We are meant to find relation and relatability with others experiencing the same duality—the good and bad, the messy and creative, the loving and fearing, the feminine and the masculine.
The Dangers of "Rugged Individualism"
In the absence of good people and leaders influencing each other, we perpetuate "rugged individualism."
We learn to get so good at doing "it all on our own" and "getting through it" that we lose the ability to be joyful about doing it together. This is where most psychosomatic illnesses are born and also right where we can heal them.
The Women's Leadership Circle at Leadership That Heals offers a space where you don't have to do it alone. It provides a space where you can be nurtured, supported, and seen by other women in leadership.
This group calls on all of our powers, skills, intentions, creativity, and deeply committed care to rewrite that story—whatever that story is for you individually.
And yet, eventually, we will grow ourselves - together.
An Invitation to Join and Grow Together
If any of this resonates, step inside yourself for a moment and journal about your relationship to be seen in the most significant ambitions that you have, to be truly witnessed in your desire to make a difference, but also be reminded that it's okay for everything to feel messy.
Journaling about this may help you to understand whether you want to join us and grow together.
How does the space co-create and co-regulate?
This group:
practices leadership as a way of being, not as a job title: Who am I, why am I here, where am I going, how do I serve, how am I getting in my own way.
shows up for each other knowing that every act of giving will turn into an act of abundant receiving.
learns to receive, not just give. (I see you!)
nurtures a somatic connection to decision-making to avoid overthinking and burnout. The body keeps the score and we need to know how, and when it keeps you away from the work, relationships and commitments you’re meant to do.
practices a repertoire of tools and prompts to nurture leadership presence. Efficiency = relational intelligence > transactional mastery
is a brave and safe space to express our deepest fears and most exhilarating dreams and turn them into actionable steps forward
offers the sacredness to be heard and seen and peel through layers of new and old trauma
encourages unconditional celebration of participants; we find joy together in collaborating and offering help outside of group sessions
is a springboard of new friendships among like-minded and like-hearted women for years to come
doesn't define progress through hard metrics, but through our participants’ ability to coherently show up, make sense, and (re-)gain perspective. Think nervous system capacity over performance.
grows through and honors conflict as an opportunity to re-establish harmony and systemically understand the patterns that keep us stuck. The new paradigm of leadership is system-based, not individiual contributor-based.
leads life, teams and themselves from a place of understanding the collective capacity, not only performance. Think embracing seasonality over year-round hustle.
dives deep into the science of nervous system health and how to lead from a place of emotional fluidity, nervous system awareness and somatic intelligence to avoid burnout and improve clarity, decision-making, boundary setting, and harmonious relationships
A space where you can be you.
Consider this an environment that complements your daily life, not as an additional commitment that takes up more time.
This space offers a bi-weekly moment of grounding and reflection so that you can keep steering your ship in the most intentional and "right" direction.
My hope is that all of this lands in your own context, that you take a moment to feel how this applies to you right now and understand what some of the gates of growth are that you want to walk through with this group.
For those that work with me in a 1:1 capacity, this will supercharge our weekly work in new ways and I am excited to see you influence folks in this group based on the work we have done together.
This is for you.
If the below speaks to you and the way you feel and think about leading, we’d be delighted to talk to you:
Leadership as a Way of Being can be found anywhere and, as a result, is not bound to women with prestigious job titles, but rather women who choose to lean into the continuous commitments life gives them as well as those they choose (even in the lowest moments).
Commitments are a form of liberation — when we know how to use our time, focus, and use our daily energy intentionally creating impact comes more seamlessly from a place of love, service, duty, and purpose.
This type of leadership is always a work in progress and not a job to be done. You can't submit leadership as a final product, paper, or service; it is an endless undertaking and a way of being. Becoming comfortable to live in the continuous grey, and stepping away from the shame we feel when we can’t fulfill the conditioned black and white of immediate gratification and progress is a massive step towards leading with more skillful action.
There is also a quieting that happens when we understand our commitments:
a quieting in our bodies
a quieting in our minds
a quieting of others questioning our choices
a quieting of our chronic stress responses
This quieting does not mean there is no tension or hard times, but it means we don't question ourselves whether this is our hardship to move through. We get better at standing in the humility of acceptance.
Leading life gets easier. There is less good or bad, and more "What am I being asked to do in this moment?".
Leadership - the good kind - enriches life, the life of the leader, and the lives of those around them.
It is also a vulnerable act of constantly shedding, understanding what works and what doesn't, assessing the effects of our actions, apologizing where needed to converge with what feels most aligned with us.
Alignment ultimately is when inner knowing and reflection meets outer expression. This is what I want for you — to live in alignment with your inner knowing and the way you bring it alive.
Recent groups included women of all ages, backgrounds, educational backgrounds, and intentions. We have senior leaders from corporate, solopreneurs, founders, VCs, new and seasoned mothers, women in transition, women leaving prestigious roles to step into “their own thing”, women who have recently gone through a major rite of passage (mariage, divorce, children, death and grief, empty nesters, living in a new country etc), and women seeking a tribe to which they can relate.
How do we gather?
You’ll join 7-9 other amazing women for this 6-month container.
After 6 months, we will decide together whether to continue. This group is ultimately yours—not mine. I am the guide, and we all get to create its culture and experience by showing up consistently, compassionately, authentically, lovingly, and honestly.
During these 6 months, we’ll meet bi-weekly over Zoom.
Sessions design:
You will join our Slack community and WhatsApp Group where we share resources, support one another, and exist together as women.
Further, you will also receive life-long access to the Leadership That Heals portal, that includes many, many goodies such as more practices, team exercises, playlists, practice videos. journaling challenges, book recommendations, podcasts, and more.
During our time together as a group, we explore topics or exercises such as:
Radical self-inquiry: Together, we will journal and take time for you to get to know yourself in a different way and through the somatic lense. This means we will take advantage of neuroscience and our understanding of how the nervous system works to answer questions such as: Who are you? Why are you here? Where are you going? (Sounds easy… but trust me… It’ll have you in for a beautiful spin)
Befriending fears, anxieties, and old conditionings physically — not just cognitively and rationally — that are standing in the way of… well… you.
Exploring goals and how they limit — somatically and mentally — your potential for legacy and creative expression.
Understanding how embodied leadership can heal past and the intergenerational traumas keeping you and your family stuck in decades-long freeze responses. It’s time to become a cycle breaker: not just aspirationally, but grounded in everyday practices.
Practicing harmonious conflict resolution and embracing conflict at work and home as a gate of growth. We will use ancient practices to lean into conscious witnessing and understand how it changes how we relate to ourselves and others at work and home.
Learning about how your nervous system works for you, not against you and how to increase daily capacity through structured pockets of pause and nervous system regulation.
Making connections between your nervous system and how it affects the collective nervous system
Diving deep into how to hold space for others, and become a source of trust with yourself, among other leaders in your team, team members, or colleagues.
Understand leadership as a way of unfolding and providing belonging, safety, and dignity to improve organizational nervous system and team-wide culture and morale.
Finding a still point in your body that regulates your most irritable responses and facilitates visioning and clear decision-making.
This is just a small list of things that we have embraced in previous groups and will embrace together.
While I provide a structural theme or practice in every session, this group thrives because we are able to show up for each other when most needed. This can mean many things, but above all it means that we will always prioritize the human connection, healing, and depth over content.
This is a human-first container. We learn through practice with each other, not through hand-outs and presentations. I am bringing this up, because it highlights the sacredness and also intentionality every member of this group brings.
and/or